Life Has Changed

Two months ago tonight, my wife was going through the final hours of labor. She delivered our beautiful daughter, Rose, at exactly the stroke of midnight. My life has never been the same. It is also never more apparent then right now, as I sit in a hotel room in New York City on my first business trip since her birth.

It is hard to quantify how life has changed. There are the tangible things, like our grocery and household goods budget going up, a new car purchased, and the # of diapers she has gone through. It is certainly easy to feel the lack of sleep, although Rose is doing as well as you could hope for in that regard by sleeping about ~6 hours straight overnight. It isn’t the old 8 hours I’m used to, but it workable.

But how do you quantify staring into her eyes, when I said her name for the first time? Hearing her squeaking cry? The first time she “baby talked”? Those tiny tears dripping from her eyes down her cheeks. The every 3–4 hours to feed her? The massive burps. How she melts into your arms and all is right in the world.

I miss her. But I do this for her. And I will be home soon.

Soon to be family of three

Over the past week or so, my wife and I have let our friends, colleagues, and acquatences know about an exciting development in our lives:

We are going to be parents sometime around July 3, 2016!

So far the little one (Baby Gonyea, or Baby G as we are calling him/her for now) is healthy, has a good heartbeat (we heard it today!), and looks great on the ultrasound.

It is a moment that both of us have wanted for years. But sometimes, wanting is just not enough. Sometimes, there are forces beyond our control. Sometimes nature needs a little or a lot of assistance.

We lucked out with our infertility treatment. One round of IUI is “all” we needed. After years of no success on our own, lots of tears, and numerous tests leading up to our first IUI treatment. The doctors said, based on various tests not returning optimal #’s in some areas, there was a fairly good chance of this round not succeeding. Yet, it was successful, to a big sigh of relief from us.

Infertility is difficult emotionally, physically, and financially. I cannot begin to count how many twists and turns we went through leading up where we are today. That’s not even counting me changing jobs right in the middle of our first (and only!) month of treatment. I certainly didn’t time that one well, but that is life and you have to take opportunities when they arise.

We have tremendous respect for those who have to go through multiple IUI rounds to the full In Vitro Fertilization (IVF) program. And that doesn’t begin to capture our heartbreak for those who have no treatment options. We had tremendous fear at times that we would fall into the later category.

I knew my life had changed forever when my wife told me the news. And I know today my life will change (again) forever in approximately seven months from now.

It will be all worth it in the end. It is already worth it now.